Funny Cat Jokes, Puns & Riddles [Cat One Liners Quotes & Humor]

A person who holds a cat would love to hear funny cat jokes and that’s what you will get from this page. After a lot of hard work, Jokes Company has formulated a list of funniest cat jokes for all the cat lovers.

With these funny cat jokes and puns, your mood will certainly lift up. Not only the cat jokes but also the cat quotes have been added to our list for more flavor.

So, let’s get started…

Cat Jokes

Best Cat Jokes

Here is the compilation of Best cat jokes for all the cat lovers.

“Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.”
“What is a cat’s way of keeping law & order?
Claw Enforcement.”
Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool?
She had mittens.”

Hilarious Bad Jokes

“I had to get rid of my husband.
He was allergic to my cat.”
“John: What does Christmas have to do with a cat lost in the desert?
Ben: Beats me.
John: They both have sandy claws.”
“What do you call the cat that was caught by the police?
The purrpatrator” 
“Q: What do you get when you cross a cat with a parrot?
A: A carrot.”
“Q: Why do cats make terrible storytellers
They only have one tail!”

Best Cat Jokes

“Why is the cat so grouchy?
Because he’s in a bad mewd”
“Q. Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide?
A. Because he’s always spotted.”
“What do cats like to eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies.”

Funny Blonde Jokes

“Where is one place that your cat can sit, but you can’t?
Your lap.”

Cat Joke Of The Day

Apart from cat puns and riddles, here is the one of the best cat jokes of the day for you.

“Q: What is a French cat’s favorite dessert?
A: Chocolate mouse.”

“Q. What side of a cat has the most fur?
A: The outside!”
“Why did the cat run from the tree?
Because it was afraid of the bark!”
“How many cats can you put into an empty box?
Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty.”

Most Funny Yo Mama Jokes

“How do cats end a fight?
They hiss and makeup”

Cat Jokes and Puns

“Q: How do cats eat spaghetti?
A: With their mouths just like everyone else.”
“Q: What looks like half a cat?
A: The other half.”
“What does a cat like to eat on a hot day?
A mice cream cone.”
“Q: What’s the second thing a cat does after it wakes up?
A: Goes back to sleep.”

Funniest Dad Jokes

“Q: How does a cat count?
A: Mew, mew-mew, mew-mew-mew…”
“Q: How do cats eat pizza?
A: They put it in their mouths just like everyone else.”
“Q: How does the cat get what it wants?
A: With purr-suasion.”
“What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat?
A peeping tom.”
“Q: When is it bad luck to see a black cat?
A: When you’re a mouse!”
“Q: What kind of kitten works at the hospital?
A: A first-aid Kit.”

Cat Joke of the day

“Q: Can a cat give a high five?
A: A: Pawsibly…”
“Q: Why was the cat so small?
A: Because it only drank condensed milk!”
“Q: “How do you know cats are sensitive?
A: They cry overspilt milk.”

Dirtiest Jokes in the world

“If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on?
Their paws.”
“What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo?
An askmew!”
“Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
He set a new lap record.”

Best Cat Jokes

“For a man to truly understand rejection…
he must first be ignored by a cat.”
“Q: What’s the worst kind of cat?
A: A cat-astrophe”

Most Funny Knock Knock Jokes

“A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a cat sitting next to him.
“Are you a cat?” asked the man, surprised.
“Yes,” the cat replied.”
“What are you doing at the movies??” the man asked.
“Well,” said the cat. “I liked the book.”
“What is cleverer than a talking cat?
A Spelling Bee”
“How is cat food sold?
A: Purr can”

Cat riddles

“Q: Why did the cat pour oil on the mouse?
A: Because it squeaked.
Q: Why do you always find a lost cat in the last place you look?
A: Because you stop looking once you find it.
“Q: How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling?
A: He’s got that down in the mouth look!”
“Q: What happened when the cat swallowed the quarter?
A: There was money in the kitty.”
“Q: Why are cats such good piano players?
A: Because they’re very mewsica”
“Q: What kind of yard work do cats like the most?
A: Meowing the lawn.”
“Q: How do you spell cat backward?
A: C-A-T B-A-C-K-W-A-R-D-S”

Best Cat Joke Ever

“Mark: How do you make a cat happy?
James: I don’t know.
Mark: Send it to the Canary Islands!”
“Charlie: What do you call a dishonest African cat?
Thomas: I have no idea.
Charlie: A lyin’ cub.”

Most Clean Jokes

“Q: How did the cat say when it met the mouse?
A: Pleased to eat you.”
“Tony: Where do cats write down their notes?
Joannie: I dunno.
Tony: On scratch paper!”
“Matt: What do you call a very poor cat?
Kate: No idea. What?
Matt: A “paw-purr.” “

Hilarious Cat Jokes

“James: Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
Ben: Tell me.
James: Because of its bark!”
“Sarah: What does a mouse weigh on a cat’s scale?
Aliza:  I don’t know. What?
Sarah: About three pounces!”
“Max: What do you call a kitten drinking lemonade?
Matt: I haven’t a clue.
Max: A sourpuss.”
“A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along when suddenly a cat attacks them. The mother mouse shouts “BARK!” and the cat runs away. “See? the mother mouse says to her baby. “Now do you see why it’s important to learn a foreign language?”
“Jake: What happened to the cat that ate the ball of yarn?
Flake: What?
Jake: It had mittens!”
A young boy felt bad after he accidentally let the neighbor’s cat get loose. After two weeks, the missing cat seemed to be gone for good.
“I’m very sorry,” the boy told the neighbor.
“I’d like to replace it for you.”
“O.K.,” the neighbor said. “How good are you at catching mice?”
“Devan: Why did the spotted cat get disqualified from the race?
Evan: Why?
Devan: It was a cheetah.”

So these are the funny cat jokes and one liners we have compiled for you. For more jokes, just visit the other pages of Jokes Company.

Leave a Comment