33 Really Funny Cheesy Jokes Ever For You [Corny One Liners]

Get the best compilation of cheesy jokes here. Find the corny cheesy jokes, cheesy joke of the day right below. Besides that, there are plenty of more really funny jokes you can get from Jokes Company.

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Here are some of the funniest corny and cheesy jokes for you, don’t forget to get the cheesy joke of the day here.

Cheesy Joke Of The Day

“When you are trying to be cheesy but everyone around you is laughter intolerant.”

Cheesy Jokes

1- “What cheese is made backwards? Edam”
2- “Two crisps were walking along the pavement. A car pulled up to them and asked if they wanted a lift.
“No thanks,” they answered, We’re walkers! “
3- “Two peanuts were walking down the street; one was a salted”
4- “Why don’t sharks eat clowns? Because they taste funny.”
5-“I could tell you the joke about the high wall… but you’d never get over it.

or the joke about the biscuit… but its a bit crummy

or the one about the butter… but you’d only spread it around”

6- ” “Who broke the window” shouted mum
“it was Bob, he ducked when I threw a stone at him” replied Ben”
7- “Who Was The First underwater spy?” said Levi
“I don’t know” replied
” James Pond” sniggered Levi
8- “What did the pencil say to the sharpener… This Relationship isn’t gonna last long !!!
9- “there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh.
No pun in ten did.”

Corny Cheesy Jokes

10- “A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named “Ahmal.”
The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him “Juan.”
Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes
she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds,
They’re twins! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.” “
11- “Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
The one turns to the other and says, “Dam!”.”
12- “A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident.
He shouted, “Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!”
The doctor replied, “I know you can’t – I’ve cut off your arms!” “
14- “Two cows are standing next to each other in a field.
Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.”
“I don’t believe you,” says Dolly. “It’s true, no bull!” exclaims Daisy.”
15- “Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other:
“Does this taste funny to you?”
16- “A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm
and says:” A beer please, and one for the road…Cheesy ever”
17- “Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.
The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.”
18- “Statistics say that 1 in 3 people are mentally ill. so check 2 of your friends and if they’re all right…then you’re the one…”
19- “There’s no point in telling someone a joke with a double meaning. they wouldn’t understand either one of them!

cheesy joke of the day

20- “Roger was in a full bus when a fat lad opposite to him said, ‘If you were a gentleman you would stand up and let someone sit down.’ ‘And if you were a lady,’ Roger replied, ‘ you would stand up and let six more people sit down!'”
21- “My cousin spent heaps on deodorant until he found out people just didn’t like him.”
22- “A woman woke up her husband in the middle of the night. “there’s a burglar in the kitchen eating the cake I made this morning!” she said “who should I call?” asked her husband, “the police or an ambulance?”
“23-There are 3 kinds of men in this world.
Some remain single and make wonders happen.
Some have girlfriends and see wonders happen.
Rest get married and wonder what happened.”

Long Cheesy Jokes

Here are some of the most hilarious and long cheesy jokes for you. Indeed, this is our finest compilation of cheesy jokes so don’t miss it out.

24- “This is seriously funny!!
_These are from a book called *’Disorder in the American Courts’* and are things people *actually said* in Court, word for word, taken down and now published by Court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place._
__________________________

*ATTORNEY*: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

*WITNESS* : Yes.

*ATTORNEY*: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

*WITNESS* : I forget.

*ATTORNEY*: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
__________________________

*ATTORNEY*: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?

*WITNESS* : Did you actually pass the law exam?
__________________________

*ATTORNEY* : The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?

*WITNESS* : He’s twenty, much like your IQ.
_________________________

*ATTORNEY* : Were you present when your picture was taken?

*WITNESS* : Are you serious.
__________________________

*ATTORNEY*: She had three children, right?

*WITNESS* : Yes.

*ATTORNEY* : How many were boys?

*WITNESS* : None.

*ATTORNEY* : Were there any girls?

*WITNESS* : Your Honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
__________________________

*ATTORNEY* : How was your first marriage terminated?

*WITNESS* : By death.

*ATTORNEY* : And by whose death was it terminated?

*WITNESS* : Take a guess.
__________________________

*ATTORNEY *: Can you describe the individual?

*WITNESS *: He was about medium height and had a beard.

*ATTORNEY *: Was this a male or a female?

*WITNESS *: Unless the Circus was in town, I’m going with male.
__________________________

*ATTORNEY *: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?

*WITNESS :* All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
__________________________

*ATTORNEY*: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

*WITNESS *: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

*ATTORNEY *: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?

*WITNESS *: If not, he was by the time I finished.
__________________________

_And the best for the last.._

*ATTORNEY*: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

*WITNESS *: No.

*ATTORNEY *: Did you check for blood pressure?

*WITNESS *: No.

*ATTORNEY *: Did you check for breathing?

*WITNESS *: No.

*ATTORNEY *: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

*WITNESS *: No.

*ATTORNEY *: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

*WITNESS *: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

*ATTORNEY *: But could the patient have still been alive?

*WITNESS*: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.”

25- “When you are bored just think about a few things that don’t make sense …like ;
🤔

  1. If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
    🤔
  2. Which letter is silent in the word “Scent,” the S or the C?
    🤔
  3. Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
    🤔
  4. Why is the letter W, in English, called double U? Shouldn’t it be called double V?
    🤔
  5. Maybe oxygen is slowly killing you and It just takes 75-100 years to fully work.
    🤔
  6. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
    🤔
  7. The word “swims” upside-down is still “swims”
    🤔
  8. 100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
    🤔
  9. If you replace “W” with “T” in “What, Where and When”, you get the answer to each of them.”

best cheesy jokes

“26- During a company’s annual family trip to a crocodile farm in Thailand… the eccentric Boss dared any of his employees to jump into the crocodiles infested pond… and swim to the shore.

Anyone who survived the swim will be rewarded with 5 million… but if killed by the crocs…2 million will be given to the next of kin.

For a long period of time no one dared take up the challenge… then suddenly a man jumped in…and swam frantically for his life towards shore pursued by the crocs…and luckily he made it unscathed.

When he managed to recover his breath… the man, who became an instant millionaire, shouted asking who pushed him into the pond….. it was his wife who did it.!!!

And from that day…that was how the phrase… “Behind every successful man…there’s a woman”…came about”

27- “If you want to be
Happy with your husband,
Love him Less &
Understand him more!

If you want to be
Happy with your wife,
Love her More &
NEVER try to Understand her !”

28- “2 Wives chatting in office :

*Wife 1*: I had a fine evening, how was Urs???

*Wife 2 *: It was a disaster. My husband came home, ate his dinner in 3 mins & fell asleep in 2 mins. How was yours?

*Wife 1 *: Oh mine was amazing! My husband came home and took me out for a romantic dinner. After dinner, we walked for an hour. When we came home he lit the candles around the house. It was like a fairytale!

At the same time, their husbands are talking at work…

*Husband 1*: How was your evening?

*Husband 2*: Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate & fell asleep. What about you?

*Husband 1*: It was horrible. I came home, there’s no dinner, they cut the electricity because I forgot to pay the bill; so I took her out for dinner which was so expensive that didn’t have money left for a cab or auto.We walked home which took an hour & when we got home I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house !!!!!!

MORAL: PRESENTATION DOES MATTER… NO MATTER WHAT THE REALITY IS !!!”

29- “Yesterday my mixer stopped working, so I went to my neighbor to borrow theirs. They asked me to use the mixer in their house only. I did.

This morning, my neighbor came to borrow my broomstick, so I asked them to come and use it in my house. They became angry.
Have I done anything wrong???”

30- “*MOM IS MOM……There was this 50-year-old lady, who suddenly started learning to swim instead of her usual routine of going to temple !!!!*_

*Everyone was curious and asked her:* *”why the change of interest to swimming now?”*

The lady, with a look of haplessness, replied: _ “Whenever my son and daughter-in-law quarreled, she would always ask: _”If your mom and I were to fall into the water, who would you save first?”_

_And because I do not want to put my son in a difficult position, I am learning to swim myself!”_

Now not long after, husband and wife were quarreling again, and the daughter-in-law again unreasonably asked: *” now tell me! If your mom and I fall into the water, who would you save first?”*

Husband replied:
*”I don’t have to get down into the water, my mom can swim, she will save you.”*

Wife refused to relent: _*”No, you have to get into the water, no matter what”*_

The husband replied: *”Then you will surely die…. because I can’t swim …. and my mom will definitely save me first.”* “

31- "A Question asked in a talent test:

If you are married to one of the twin sisters, how wud u recognize ur wife?

The award-winning answer was!
.
.
.
Why shud I ??"

most funny cheesy jokes

32- “A VERY SHOCKING…
Very Shocking “story”…….

This is a real story of a young college girl who passed away last month in Coimbatore

Her name was Priya. She was hit by a truck.
She was working in a call center.

She had a boyfriend named Shankar.

Both of them were true lovers. They always talked on the phone.
You would never find her without handphone.

She used to spend half of the day talking with Shankar.

Priya’s family knew about their relationship.

Shankar was very close to Priya’s family as well.
(Just imagine their love) .

Before she passed away she always told her friends ‘If I pass away please burn me with my handphone’

She also said the same thing to her parents.

After her death, people couldn’t carry her body, A lot of them tried to do so, but still can’t.

Everybody had tried to carry the body, the results were the same.

Eventually, they called a person known to one of their neighbors, who can speak with the soul of the dead person and who was a friend of her father.

He took a stick and started speaking to himself slowly.

After a few minutes, he said

‘this girl misses something here.’

Then her friends told that person about her intentions to burn her with her phone.

He then opened the grave box and place her phone and sim card inside the casket.

After that they tried to carry the body.

It was then moved easily and they then carried her into the van.

All of us were shocked.

Priya’s parents did not inform Shankar that Priya had passed away..

After 2 weeks Shankar called Priya’s mom…..

Shankar :…..’Aunty, I’m coming home today.. Cook something nice for me.

Don’t tell Priya that I’m coming home today, I wanna surprise her.’

Her mother replied….. ‘You come home first, I wanna tell you something very important.’

After he came,

they told him the truth about Priya.

Shankar thinks that they were playing a fool.

He was laughing and said ‘don’t try to fool me – tell Priya to come out, i have a gift for her. Please stop this nonsense’.

Then they show him the original death certificate to him.

They gave him proof to make him believe. (Shankar started to sweat)

He said…

‘Its not true..

We spoke yesterday..

She still calls me.

Shankar was shaking.

Suddenly, Shankar’s phone rang..

‘see this is from Priya, see this….’

he showed the phone to priya’s family.

All of them told him to answer.

He talked using the loudspeaker mode..

All of them heard his conversation.

Loud and clear,
no cross lines,
no humming.

It is the actual voice of Priya & there is no way others could use her sim card since it is nailed inside the grave box

They were so shocked and asked for the same person’s
(who can speak with the soul of dead person) help again.

He brought his master to solve this matter.

He & his master worked for 5 hours.

Then they discovered one thing which really shocked them….

AIRTEL 4G has the best coverage ‘ it even covers network above World also!!!’

Don’t shout at me . . .

I am also looking for the idiot who sent me this….

So, now you too should forward this to all your nearest and dearest”

33- “Long one but fun to READ

THE 6 BEST AFFAIRS:

———————

The 1st Affair
A married man was having an affair
with his secretary.

One day they went to her place
and made love all afternoon.

Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes
outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.

He put on his shoes and drove home.

‘Where have you been?’ his wife demanded.

‘I can’t lie to you,’ he replied,

‘I’m having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon.’

She looked down at his shoes and said:

‘You lying bastard! You’ve been playing golf!’

———————

The 2nd Affair

A middle-aged couple had two
beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son.

They decided to try one last time
for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child
he had ever seen.

He told his wife:

‘There’s no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!
Have you been fooling around behind my back?’

The wife smiled sweetly and replied:
‘No, not this time!’

———————

The 3rd Affair

A mortician was working late one night.

He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated,
and made a startling discovery.
Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!

‘I’m sorry Mr. Schwartz,’ the mortician commented, ‘I can’t allow you to be cremated
with such an impressive private part.
It must be saved for posterity.’

So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home.

‘I have something to show
you won’t believe,’ he said to his wife, opening his briefcase.

‘My God!’ the wife exclaimed,
‘Schwartz is dead!’

———————

The 4th Affair

A woman was in bed with her lover
when she heard her husband
opening the front door.

‘Hurry,’ she said, ‘stand in the corner.’

She rubbed baby oil all over him,
then dusted him with talcum powder.

‘Don’t move until I tell you,’
she said. ‘Pretend you’re a statue.’

‘What’s this?’ the husband inquired as he entered the room.

‘Oh it’s a statue,’ she replied.
‘The Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too.’

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up,
went to the kitchen and returned
with a sandwich and a beer.

‘Here,’ he said to the statue, ‘have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing.’

———————

The 5th Affair

A man walked into a cafe,
went to the bar and ordered a beer.

‘Certainly, Sir, that’ll be one cent.’

‘One Cent?’ the man exclaimed.

He glanced at the menu and asked:
‘How much for a nice juicy steak
and a bottle of wine?’

‘A nickel,’ the barman replied.

‘A nickel?’ the man.
‘Where’s the guy who owns this place?’

The bartender replied:
‘Upstairs, with my wife.’

The man asked:
‘What’s he doing upstairs with your wife?’

The bartender replied:
‘The same thing I’m doing
to his business down here.’

———————

The 6th & Best Affair

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly:
‘I have something I must confess.’

‘There’s no need to, ‘his wife replied.

‘No,’ he insisted,
‘I want to die in peace.
I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend!

‘I know,’ she replied.
‘Now just rest and let the poison work”

So, these are our list of very best cheesy jokes for you. Keep visiting us for more corny cheesy jokes as well.

 

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